Sacroiliac (SI) Joint Instability
Several years ago, I noticed an anomaly in my own body that I began to observe in the bodies of many of my students. And I wasn’t the only one who took notice. I would often have students ask me after class, why it was that they could perform an asana so well on one side and yet struggle with it immensely on the other side. While there are many factors that can contribute to this occurrence, for the purposes of this article, I would like to focus on the sacroiliac joint and the importance of mindfulness within asymmetrical postures.
A Quick Assessment of the Pelvis
Too often within a yoga class setting, we teachers can be overwhelmed by the number of students. It can be daunting to familiarize yourself with every student’s compensation patterns, misalignments and injuries! Something that I have started offering in my group classes, is the opportunity for students to become aware of these patterns themselves. This can be implemented at the very beginning of the practice in a non-invasive way that integrates into a peaceful breathwork practice.
Invite students to lie on their mats in a gentle posture with their knees bent and thighs rolled medially toward one another. Beginning with a gentle and easy breath, I encourage students to invite ease into their abdomen as they inhale, allowing the navel to float away from the spine. On their exhale, students are invited to gently allow their navel to settle back toward their spine. I use this opportunity to walk around the room so that I can look for 2 things, the position of their navel and the position of their anterior superior iliac spine (ASIS).
What direction is the navel pointing? In a balanced pelvis, the navel should point straight ahead. If imbalance is present, the navel may point more to the left or the right. The direction that the navel points, can indicate the direction to which the pelvis is ‘twisting’. For example, in my own pelvis, there is a slight pointing of the navel to the right-hand side. This coincides with a posterior tilting of my right ilium and an anterior tilting of my left ilium.
Can you see the ASIS on both the left and right-hand sides? (On your own body, you can easily palpate the ASIS by sliding your hands down from your waist until you feel the upper rim of the ilium on either side. From here, slide your hands smoothly down along the front of your pelvis, maintaining contact with the pelvic rim. You will reach a bony protrusion along the front (anterior) and in the upper section (superior) of the pelvis. This is your anterior superior iliac spine.) Is one ASIS more prominent than the other or higher than the other? A lower ASIS indicates an ilium that is rotated more toward the anterior (front of the body) and a higher ASIS indicates an ilium that may be rotated more toward the posterior (back of the body).
What do you See?
If you feel unclear while students are lying down, another strong indicator of imbalance is what you see when students are simply seated with legs crossed on their mats. Is one leg higher than the other? Do they tend to favour one side more than the other? Have they expressed to you that certain asymmetrical poses (postures where the body is not doing the same thing on both sides; such as triangle pose) are easier on one side more so than the other? You can easily peak at students while they are in seated or standing postures to look at the navel and the ASIS throughout the practice.
Self Awareness – What do they Feel?
As students are practicing gentle breath work on the floor, you can invite them to roll the pelvis from side to side and to gently circle the pelvis along the edges of the sacrum. Invite them to place their hands on their navel and on the ASIS. You can still encourage breath work, please do, but use this time to draw awareness of the alignment of their body. This can be shared in a positive way that helps students to more deeply connect with their bodies through the process of ‘embodiment’ rather than making someone feel badly that there is something ‘wrong’ with them. Be mindful of the language that you employ. Ask questions around what students feel? As they rock the pelvis back and forth along the floor, do the two sides of the pelvis roll smoothly together? Does it feel like one side is more prominent? You can invite this awareness into the practice, especially as they explore any postures that are asymmetrical in nature. Start the conversation with them around the experience of the pose from side to side. Does one side feel stronger or more flexible? Is it easier to perform certain asana on one side more so than the other?
Modifying the Practice and Self Care
If you, or a student, become aware of a misalignment, how does that change the practice? What should they do, and more importantly, what should they avoid? I would like to give 3 suggestions here regarding movement within all asana, asana to avoid and asana to focus on.
Movement within Asana
If a misalignment becomes apparent, rather than suggesting that students always start on the right-hand side, give the option for students to start practicing on the side they find most difficult. Slow down. Focus on mindful and smooth movement. Emphasize the importance of transitioning from asana to asana as part of the practice. Really look for the end feel, meaning, where does the movement want to end? Is there a moment in the transition, where the body meets its end feel, but your student wiggles around it to ‘achieve’ the ‘full’ pose? Where is the spot where they stick? Tell them to stay there and dance with that space, even if it feels like they are no longer doing the posture or it doesn’t ‘look’ right. Emphasize how it feels, versus how it looks. Most importantly, the less mobile side needs to be the determining factor for how deeply a student goes into a pose. If the right side can only move 2 inches forward into a pose, than the left side, no matter how mobile, must only go that same 2 inches. When we do not do this, we create instability and yoga practice becomes harmful instead of helpful.
A note on end feel – To explore what wiggling past your end feel looks like, I would like to give an example. Have your students stand in mountain pose. Ask them to lift their arms in front of their body and slowly draw their arms back toward their ears or beyond. Watch their ribs as they do this. Is there a point where their arms no longer smoothly go back and they pop their ribs forward in order to ‘achieve’ the direction you have given? Have them repeat the movement without popping the ribs forward and assess where their actual end feel is for their shoulder mobility.
Asana to Avoid
In the case of the pelvis, there are certain postures that can be destabilizing to the SI joint and over the course of time, if done incorrectly, can cause damage. Should you or your student be struggling with SI instability, I would think strongly about intelligently adapting or modifying any asymmetrical asana. I give the examples of two asana below, one with lateral movement and one with forward movement so that you can get the idea and apply it to other postures.
Triangle Pose (Trikonasana), an Asymmetrical Pose with Lateral Movement
What occurs in the SI joint is greatly impacted by the rotation of our thighs. When we medially rotate our thighs, it creates space in the SI joint, allowing for greater movement. When we laterally rotate our thighs, it decreases the space in the SI joint, which can cause wear and tear between the sacrum and the ilium. (Often when an individual walks on their lesser toes, there is a coinciding lateral rotation of that leg.) In the case of triangle pose, it is very important that we look at the positioning of our forward leg. Is the student supinating their foot, ie: rolling slightly onto the lateral edge of their foot or peeling their arch off the floor? What direction is their knee pointing? When your student enters the posture, does their knee cap roll too far medially? To modify triangle pose, invite your students to gently bend their forward knee until it tracks forward. If the foot is supinated or pronated, ask them to lift the heel of their forward foot until they can stand equally into the ball of the foot. Ask them to engage their core as they slowly lean toward their forward leg and ensure that they stop at that point where they feel their true end feel, or when you observe they begin to wiggle past their sticking point. Also, make sure to look closely at their back leg and ensure that they are medially rotating the thigh while grounding firmly through the heel of the foot.
Low Lunge (Anjaneyasana), an Asymmetrical Pose with Forward Movement
I choose this pose because of the variation often enjoyed in yoga classes, where students are invited to draw the torso forward with the opportunity to place their forearms on the floor. If you consider what we have already discussed in this article regarding wiggling around our end feels to achieve postures, this variation of the pose would be an excellent example of where this occurs and can cause detriment to the SI joint.
In the humble variation of low lunge, the SI joint can be negatively impacted when the posture is forced. To enter the ‘full’ variation, a few movements need to occur. The rectus femoris, aka your hip flexor, needs to be able to lengthen fully. If the rectus femoris in the rear leg is shortened for any reason, your student’s ability to create the needed distance between their two legs will be greatly reduced. Without the pelvis positioned closely enough toward the floor, the temptation will be to force the asana by taking the stretch into the lower back and pelvis; into the SI ligaments which serve to stabilize the pelvis. Overtime, ignoring this compensation can lead to SI ligament strain, making this posture a contributor to SI instability and potential pelvic shearing, where the bones of the SI joint rub together. This is also aggravated by the second compensation students will likely utilize to ‘achieve’ getting their arms on the floor, which is a lateral rotation through the anterior leg to make space for the torso and arms. (If you recall, a lateral movement compresses the bones of the sacrum and ilium against one another, thereby closing the joint. Not an ideal scenario!
To modify the posture and make it pelvic aware, lets look at the intention of the asana. What is it that we are hoping to achieve by utilizing the pose in our yoga class? Could we achieve the same intention with an alternate pose altogether? Anjaneyasana is a precursor to hanumanasana, the Monkey God Pose or splits. Its main intention is to stretch the hip flexors of the back leg. If this is our emphasis, we can modify the pose by using a stool, by placing the foot of the back leg on a stool with our knee gently placed on a small bolster or folded blanket. (When the knee is bent we emphasize stretching into the rectus femoris. When it is straight we emphasize stretching the iliopsoas, which by the way, is not a hip flexor, but it can contribute to anterior pelvic tilt.) Other cues that I would offer and things that I would look for, is to make sure that the adductors, inner thigh muscles, are firmly engaged along with the transverse abdominus muscles of the abdomen. This protects the SI joint and prevents us from wiggling around our limitations. Finally, only go as far as you or your student is able to go without losing the straight tracking forward of the pelvis.
Asana to Focus On
Table Pose (Goasana)
This is a great posture for pelvic support. Often when I teach this pose with the option to extend the leg, one of the first things I observe is that most students will laterally rotate their extended leg to ‘achieve’ the pose. To help create better pelvic stability, you can utilize this pose to teach your students how to properly engage gluteus maximus. One way that I do this is to invite students to first start the extension process by using the grounding of their rear foot of the extended leg. By inviting them to anchor their toes to the floor and reach out through the heel, we use this time to focus on medial rotation of the thigh and engagement of the adductors. I will at times, place my hand along their inner ankle of the extended leg and ask them to press into my hand. Once this is comfortable, we attempt lifting the extended leg while maintaining the alignment. Sometimes students are only able to lift an inch off the floor before they begin to lose their alignment by laterally rotating. So, this is where I tell them to work.
Block Squeeze and Strap Press
This is a movement therapy technique that integrates seamlessly within a yoga class setting. From a supine (lying on the back) or seated in a chair, you will need a block and a strap. Place the block between the knees and ensure that the feet are tracking straight ahead. Wrap the strap firmly around the thighs. Using a count of 10, ask students to hug the block with their knees and then have them press out into the strap for an equal amount of time. I usually do 3 sets of these.
Secondary Compensations and Further Care
Beyond an SI imbalance there are further considerations that should be explored. Namely, what is happening in the knees, the thighs, feet and lumbar spine. In the case of pelvic shearing, where the SI joint has been damaged, other factors can be at play. Is there dysfunction in the gluteus medius or ligament laxity in the SI joint? How does your student step when they are walking? Did you know that we are meant to step into the greater toes, big toe (hallucis), pointer toe and middle toe, when we walk and run? When we don’t as in the case of a medial knee injury like an MCL or meniscal injury and we step into the lesser toes along the outer edge of the foot, this causes an impact that can lead to pelvic shearing in the SI joint! Also, SI imbalance can contribute to functional scoliosis.
The good news? There are wonderful health care providers these days such as Physiotherapists, Yoga Therapists, Osteopaths and Massage Therapists, who can help your student on their path to full mobility and recovery. I believe that for anyone who teaches a movement based practice, the best approach is for you to seek out these services for yourself, ask around for referrals from other yoga teachers. What is important is that you find health care providers who understand the unique movements that yoga practices can employ so that they can recommend the best recovery approaches.
I get asked a lot lately to clarify the difference between Thai Yoga Massage and Thai Yoga Therapy. in our training program, we offer a certification track for Thai Yoga Massage Practitioner and an advanced track for Thai Yoga Therapist. So, what makes our approach so unique?
Thai Yoga Massage originated in Thailand as a form of physical therapy. Unlike Western approaches, it works the whole body with gentle stretching, rocking, massaging and acupressure. It is gentle and dance like, elegant and simple all at once.
When I became a Yoga Therapist, I began integrating aspects of Thai Massage with my yoga therapy practices and overtime it became something beautiful in its own right. Yoga Therapy addresses all 5 layers of the person - Physical, Emotional, Mental, Energetic and Purpose. We use breath work to regulate the mind and intelligent asana hacks to regulate the body to either release myofascia or repattern muscles. It is slow and mindful and integrates meditation, energy work in the form of marma therapy and craniosacral techniques for restoring the nervous system.
My passion for sometime now has been two fold - both physiological and emotional.
With physiological challenges in my own body that include my knees, pelvis, spine and even my jaw, the most interesting aspect of the Thai Yoga Therapy program is the modules that focus on the lower and upper regions of the body. This is where we look at each myofascial line of the body and explore unique and empowering movements for releasing and repatterning the entire body. It is something that I have worked on for over 10 years and it has become a pretty efficient system. We explore anatomy and play with clay so that the learning is 3 dimensional.
On the emotional side, I struggled with strong emotions through out my later childhood and into my early 20's. Anxiety, depression and stress, the Ayurvedic trifecta of the human condition is the focus in the three modules focused on these emotions. This is where the breathwork, marma therapy, meditation and energy work comes in, but also the knowledge for knowing when to move and when to be still.
In the video, above, I am working with Jess through a more physical practice for releasing the front body. It gives you a glimpse into what a session can look like, but just a glimpse. With so many tools and areas to focus, each and every session is uniquely moving in its own way.
Somehow, today felt like the day to release this. I have been passionate about supporting women (and men) through the overpowering emotions of anxiety and depression for years now. What many people don't realize, is that my comfort with supporting others while going through something so uncomfortable has come from my own personal experience with these emotions. This was a video that I filmed last year for Mind with Matter, a company I have chosen to align myself and Mandorla with. It was filmed just weeks before my daughter was born, which is why it somehow got buried in the archives.
My hope in sharing this is that in presenting a different perspective on these difficult emotions that we can shift how we think of others and ourselves.
So much love,
Its #teachertuesday here at Mandorla and this week we are highlighting therapeutic teacher, Yulia Rudko. Yulia teaches our #Meridianyoga classes on Thursday mornings at 9:30am. Come check her out at the Calgary studio!
When I thought about the topic of life purpose it brought thoughts like:
"Life Purpose... Wow! That's too big!.. And scary... It's like goals… I do not like goals... It might be too stressful to think about life purpose… Can’t I just float and not worry about it? Do I need one? Is everyone supposed to have a purpose? If purpose was easy then by nature I am meant to be light and playful; and hopefully others will see that you don't need to be so hard on yourself and to be so serious all the time. Is that good enough of a life purpose? If I die tomorrow how would I be remembered? Would people think I contributed? And does it matter what they think? Or maybe even does it matter what I think? Who am I anyways?"
I used to think I needed to have something grandiose done - something that many people will know and remember and associate with my name. Oh the ego!...
I don't even remember how, but yoga undid those painful ways of thinking. Now that I write this, there is such an ease in my heart and no desire to be known, and no reason. But sometimes my ego says: "You don't know anything really", "You need to study for years more until you can be anyone or work with anyone". And recently: "What if someone comes to you with questions about life purpose? What are you going to do or say? How are you going to work with this?"
But I put it aside and remind myself that I need to feel joy. When I teach yoga or work with the person in a healing session there is joy and the good feeling of not having any other choice but doing this is there. So I'll just feel my way into it - into doing and having a purpose.
It might be that purpose finds us and not the other way around. But that happens, I think, only when you quiet down enough and become honest with yourself and see the gifts that you already have. There is no strain there, not even when hard work is involved, and the sense of time disappears also. You don't strive to bring something into your life because someone is successful at it or is profiting from it, you bring it because that's what gives you joy.
Is life purpose something that all human-beings either think about, talk about, or search for in their lives? Or is it only those of us who are very identified with our minds that think about it or search for it? Maybe it’s always there for us and we are so blinded by thinking that we don’t see or feel it? It seems we all need to connect to it throughout our time here on Earth. I think we feel unfulfilled if we don't have an idea about our purpose here. Without it we just float
and sometimes get confused and entangled in thoughts, behaviours, and situations that do not bring us ease, joy or self-realization. Exploration of this topic with Eckhart Tolle's book "The New Earth" brings me to the understanding that there is inner and outer purpose. Inner purpose is the primary purpose which we share with all humanity and it's to awaken. Outer purpose has to with doing and is secondary. How do we align inner and outer? Eckhart Tolle says: "Finding and living in alignment with the inner purpose is the foundation for fulfilling your outer purpose... Without that alignment, you can still achieve certain things through effort, struggle, determination, sheer hard work or cunning. But there is no joy in such endeavour, and it invariably ends in some form of suffering... Awakening is a shift in consciousness in which thinking and awareness separate... Only the first awakening, the first glimpse of consciousness without thought, happens by grace... Opening yourself to the emerging consciousness and bringing its light into this world then becomes the primary purpose of your life."
"According to the Vedas, our soul has four distinct desires, which collectively are described in the tradition as purushartha, ‘for the purpose of the soul’. The four desires—dharma, artha, kama, and moksha...", writes Rod Stryker in his book "The Four Desires". Out of the four desires moksha is the one that correlates the most to the primary purpose described by Eckhart Tolle. "Moksha is the longing for liberation, true freedom. It is the intrinsic desire to realize a state free from all boundaries... It is the longing to know the Eternal, that which is beyond all limitations, beyond the province of the ﬁve senses and even death. It is the impulse that compels us to seek out prayer, meditation, contemplation, surrender."
After contemplating life purposes myself, I can see that in my work as a yoga therapist I will be able to assist a person who is looking for his or her life purposes. After all, yoga is designed to help people to awaken. Depending on the situation and client, an application of any or all of the 8 limbs of yoga, and knowledge of gunas, kleshas and kanchukas will lay the way for seekers to dis-identify with thinking, bringing a dimension of awareness into their life. This in return brings awakening - the primary purpose.
- Book "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle
- Adaptation of the book for the website: "The Four Desires: Creating a Life of Purpose, Happiness, Prosperity, and Freedom" by Rod Stryker https://yogainternational.com/article/view/destiny-and-desire-finding-yourpurpose
I always tell my yoga teacher training students that they don't need to look beyond their own struggles and experiences for pulling meaning into their classes. I tell them to let go of the idea that as teachers that they need to be perfect or 'other than'. I tell them to let go of the idea that there are emotions that are ok to feel and emotions that are not ok to feel and to just use whatever emotion they are currently experiencing as an opportunity to drop into their bodies and really feel. Yoga is a powerful tool. It is this amazing French restaurant with all these nuances and flavours and often, we come to our mats and we order the French fries. We hold so much emotion in our bodies and there is this profound opportunity to face our fears, to let go of the emotions that we are holding in our tissues and to embody a new pattern for ourselves.
So, as I headed to the studio this morning, I found myself thinking about FEAR. In Sanskrit there are two terms: sankalpa and vikalpa. Sankalpa is the intentions that we set for ourselves and the dreams that we imagine. Vikalpa is the core underlying beliefs that we hold deep in our psyche that tend to sabotage or undermine our intentions. And so I found myself thinking about fear and my own vikalpas that stem from fear. At some point, I think I confused being nice with giving away my power because I associated being powerful with taking power from someone else. At some point, I adopted the message that the most important things are to keep the peace, to be nice, to make sure that others are happy with you. But at their roots these messages stem from fear, fear that if I am assertive and direct, that if I speak out powerfully that this will cause others to be displeased with me, to not like me or that I might cause them pain or hurt their feelings.
And so, this is what I framed this mornings empowered flow yoga class around. I invited students to face their fears, to explore the things that they believe at their core and to inquire into what is holding them back. I asked them what they felt ready to let go of today and what new pattern they would like to see for themselves. It was so moving to hear students share about their own fears of insecurity, unworthiness and self doubt. Vulnerability is often portrayed as weakness, but the vulnerable quality in the room was anything but. It was powerful and emboldening to hear and see over and over again how these are human struggles and issues, that at our core we are not alone in our troubles.
As I pondered the theme of facing fears and letting go, I couldn't think of anything better to explore asana wise than sirsasana (headstand). At first glance, the pose looks like it is about strength and balance, which it is, but there is so much more that goes into the posture behind the scenes. The effect that it has on you emotionally and energetically is transformative and empowering. It quite literally turns your world upside down. I often see students kicking and perhaps flailing a little bit into the pose and like my french fry analogy, when we enter the posture this way, we miss the point and we lose out on the benefits the posture offers. It truly is the perfect pose for learning how to let go of fear and step into a new way of seeing things.
To see how I sequenced the class , read my next post on Sirsasana.
For #womenshealthwednesday I wanted to share three poses that prepare the body during pregnancy for a more easeful labour.
Pictured above is baddha konasana or bound angle pose. This is a common suggestion for pregnancy but it is often practiced incorrectly. When practiced in a seated position, we draw the tailbone back behind the body, allowing the hips to roll forward into an anterior (forward) position. To facilitate this, I suggest placing a folded blanket underneath your seat and sliding forward until your sitz bones roll off the blanket onto the floor. Your tailbone and glutes should still be on the blanket. You can imagine that if you were to grow a tail that it would extend back behind your body as opposed to being tucked forward toward your legs. When we allow the tailbone to roll back into this position, taking it out of a tucked stance, we create freedom in the pelvic floor muscles.
This is because the pelvic floor muscles, create a sling from the tailbone (coccyx) to the front of the pelvic bowl. When the tailbone is tucked, the pelvic floor muscles shorten. In this shortened state they are unable to fire correctly and we can develop dysfunction. With the tailbone in its optimal position we can develop tension free strength as all of the muscles are in their optimal position for firing correctly. For labour this becomes crucial. With the pelvic floor in a tension free state, we have less resistance during birth and have more control over engaging and working with our bodies to facilitate vaginal delivery.
In the later stages of labour this stance, with the tailbone lifted becomes even more important. Pictured above is malasana (or squat pose). In this position with the legs turned out laterally and the tailbone lifted, the lower portion of the pelvis opens up more fully. (I will talk more on how the positioning of the legs affects the opening of the pelvis next week.) To come into the pose safely, without harming your knees. Turn the legs out laterally with toes pointing toward the long edges of your mat. Lower into the pose with firm thighs slowly. You can place a block under your seat for stability if you like. Once there, use your elbows to create stability by pressing into your inner thighs while focusing on drawing your tail bone toward the back of the room.
To finish the sequence, I like to end with supta baddha konasana or supine bound angle pose. This is a great posture for releasing the low back and hips while giving you time to rest and re-energize while pregnant. I would be less likely to use this pose during labour and view this posture more as a posture during your preparation times. As you progress further into pregnancy, you will want to use more than one bolster so that your heart is elevated higher than your hips. You can view the video on my instagram feed https://www.instagram.com/mandorlayoga/
We are all born with an innate knowledge of what we need and what we want. It would seem that for many adults, we have lost touch with these inner mechanisms. One of the very first things that I share with my students is to learn how to re-establish a dialogue with these inner mechanisms within their bodies. Instead of going into stories, explanations and narratives about why things are the way they are; we instead talk about the physical sensations that result from these experiences.
Our minds like to categorize experiences in an effort to make sense of things and often, at least on a subconscious level, an experience that we are having now will trigger something in the mind, somehow linking it to an event from our past. If you smell a chocolate cake baking in the oven, you may be reminded of a previous occasion or occasions when you enjoyed eating chocolate cake. On a different level however, a colleague may express a need to speak with you. Based on their body language, you may feel a sense of unease as your mind decides, based on past experience that the conversation is probably about something negative. Whether your perception is true or not doesn’t matter. Your body reacts on a chemical level to what you perceive to be true in this moment and a cycle begins.
Like a storm that rapidly builds, there are warning signs in the initial phases that you can become aware of. Based on your own neurological patterning, you will likely feel something physically first. It might be a tightening of your chest or throat, a gripping in your stomach, an increase in body temperature or sweating. From there, you may experience a surge of adrenaline and feel a quickening in your heart or an increase in your blood pressure. Depending on your past experiences and what your mind is associating the current experience with, you will have your own unique pattern. In a sense, this is the calm before the storm of thoughts and emotions that will begin to craft the explanation and story for why you are feeling this way. Given enough time, you may begin to imagine the conversation that you will have with your co-worker and so on, until you are fully in the storm of thoughts and emotions that may consume you.
Many of us have been given the message that we shouldn’t feel ‘bad’ or ‘negative’ emotions. And our culture tends to encourage the stifling of behavior that falls outside of socially accepted levels of sarcasm, blasé and humour. We are encouraged to entertain or distract ourselves when we feel depleted and to numb ourselves when we feel uncomfortable. But if we can become knowledgeable about our patterns that rear up when we encounter trigger situations, we can create new patterns for ourselves that allow us to live our lives with freedom, ease and a sense of lightness.
And this begins by tapping into the physical sensations that we feel. Notice the patterns that you have throughout your day. How are you seated? Are you gripping or clenching any of your muscles? How are you breathing? What do you feel physically in your body?
There is a mistaken concept around meditation that it is about turning off your thoughts and controlling your mind. Like everything else, we have ideas about what meditation should be like and who it is for. Because of this, you may have an idea in your head that you are too stressed out to meditate, that you couldn’t sit still or that it would drive you crazy or be horribly boring.
What I would like to suggest to you is something a little more pragmatic. You can say, “I have had enough today.” You can acknowledge that you feel stressed or spread thin, frustrated, tired, angry, or sad. You can give yourself permission to feel whatever it is you are feeling. A study in British Columbia showed that students are showing less empathy these days and the hypothesis around why this is so, was based on the fact that children are not given enough empty pockets of time in their days anymore. Their little schedules are as packed and chaotic as our adult ones. Give yourself permission to clear your schedule, even if only for 5 minutes between meetings. Go in the bathroom stall and shut the door. Sit in your car with the music off. And once you are there, instead of trying to force yourself into a different state of mind, instead of fighting with how you are actually feeling; close your eyes and allow yourself to feel the physical sensation. Don’t try to change it in anyway but allow yourself to feel it. Let yourself notice your patterns that exist.
From there keep your awareness on what you are feeling and if the sensation changes, let your awareness naturally shift to that new sensation. It may be helpful for you to label the sensation you feel. Just avoid investigating it beyond that. Let go of the story or narrative behind the sensation and just feel the sensation in its pure form.
If an emotion comes up, do the same thing. You can name it but avoid the story behind it. Drop into the emotion and let yourself feel it.
Thoughts can be tricky as they come in a torrent but even then, what is the flavor of the thought? Is it based in worry, fear, or planning? Name it and let yourself feel the essence behind the flood of words.
In my experience with stress and anxiety and all the joys of dealing with other humans, I have found that the more I practice these techniques; the more able I am to notice the initial triggers that set me off. As I learn my patterns more and more, I have found that I often can nip the storm in the bud before it begins. I can say “I have had enough today” and taking some quiet time for myself to sit with the physical sensations that are unique to my own psyche, they seem to dissolve, more quickly on some days than others. I find myself having a stronger dialogue with what I need and want in a given situation and more aware of the situations that tend to trigger a reaction in the first place. This is empowering for me and I find I am able to go into situations that were previously terrifying for me with a great deal of more ease, confidence and freedom.
Stefani Wilton and Contributors
Finding beauty in the midst of joyous imperfection